Crank My Cat

Fair, Not Fair:

The United States is becoming more and more overpopulated and indigent care in our hospitals is a growing problem. Birth control pills, abortions, condoms and other ways of preventing unwanted babies are just not working. Abstinence works every time it’s tried, but unfortunately, it’s not tried every time. I propose that the Federal government implement 3 plans that would be as fair as possible for all.

Proposal #1

• Free vasectomies for all male US citizens ages 16-up.

Let’s face it. People are going to have sex. It’s what makes the world go ‘round. Vasectomies are inexpensive and easily reversible. There are many benefits for a man getting a vasectomy and they are listed below. When a man or couple is actually ready to have a child, he/they would have to work hard and save their money (i.e. grow up and be responsible) to get the reversal done. I realize having children is a blessing, but I also realize that having kids when people are not ready for them is hard on everyone in the family and not to mention society. I understand there are other problems that go along with sex other than unwanted pregnancies like STD’s. I’m not encouraging sex before or outside of marriage. Honestly, all I really care about is the human baby that is created as a result. Who people decide to have sex with is their business, not mine. I’ll teach my kids. You teach yours.

Here’s how it would work. Any male, US citizen age 16-up could get a vasectomy from a government approved urologist. After completing the one-week follow-up visit, that person would be issued a $3,000 check from the United States Treasury and a certificate of authenticity. The physician would be reimbursed from the Federal government for services rendered. Married couples would receive a $6,000 check. For every year that the man stays “cut”, he would receive a $3,000 income tax credit ($6,000 for married couples). One year follow-up visits would be required.

Benefits:
• Unwanted pregnancies would drop significantly
• The tax rebate would stimulate our ailing economy
• Hospital indigent care would drop significantly
• Abortion rates would drop
• Teen pregnancies would drop
• Jobs would be created in the vasectomy industry

Proposal #2

• Mandatory drug tests for all elected officials across the board.

There is a huge debate for drug testing these days. Most employers and insurance companies require a “clean” drug test prior to employment. Now, some lawmakers want welfare recipients to take a drug test before receiving unemployment benefits, which is fine with me. I think that all elected officials from local leaders all the way to the President should be required to take a mandatory hair follicle drug test every 3 months. No pass, no play.

Benefits:
• Jobs would be created in the drug testing industry
• Politicians would be held to account like the rest of society


Proposal #3

• Marijuana should be made legal to manufacture, distribute, consume and possess just like alcohol is.

The debate on whether or not to legalize marijuana has been around for decades. Here’s another “let’s face it” moment. People are going to smoke marijuana. It is a huge problem in the US. If alcohol is legal, marijuana should be legal.

Benefits:

• Our over-crowded prisons would be able house real criminals
• Many, many jobs would be created
• Smugglers from other countries would be out of business
• Tax revenue would allow for many social improvements
• Other, more harsh, narcotics abuse would go down
• Alcohol abuse would go down
• Law enforcement would be able to focus on catching real criminals
• Families who have a parent that smokes pot who are otherwise a good, law abiding citizen won’t be torn apart just because mom or dad got thrown in jail because they got arrested for marijuana possession.


Really. To all of the politicians who say alcohol should be legal and pot illegal, I ask why? Why should a drug like alcohol be legal and marijuana not be legal? Everybody knows the dangers and the problems of alcohol: drunk driving, domestic abuse, liver diseases, binge drinking, etc. It’s quite easy for a person to drink themselves to death, but virtually impossible to “smoke” themselves to death. Our own president has even openly admitted and laughed about smoking. How many other elected officials have done (or still do) the same thing, yet keep laws on the books that makes life hell for the average Joe and his family who gets caught with an ounce of weed?
Seriously, have you ever heard of a woman getting beat up because a man was high? No. Have you ever heard of a woman getting beat up because a man was drunk? Duh. Unfortunately, it happens all of the time. And it’s all because a minority of the population wants to tell a large portion of the population, that they can drink alcohol, but not smoke marijuana. If people are going to smoke it anyway, why not legalize it and tax it?
If all of these hypocrites want to push to keep pot outlawed, then why don’t they push that hard to outlaw alcohol? Just legalize it. Obviously, you can’t show up to work stoned, but you can’t show up to work drunk either. You’re not allowed to drink and drive but you’re not allowed to smoke and drive either.
Please keep in mind as you read and ponder what I’ve just said. I am a hard-core conservative. I am a champion for private property. I abhor abortions. I am a sinner and a Christian who loves Jesus Christ. I think marriage should be between a man and a woman. By definition, homosexuality is merely sex between members of the same sex. The thought of homosexuality is gross to me, but it’s none of my damn business what other people prefer. I don’t judge people on their sexual preference. At the same time, it’s OK for me to think it’s gross. I’m sure there are some homosexual people that think heterosexual sex is gross. That’s fine with me… doesn’t bother me at all.
I am not going to encourage my young children to start having sex or smoking pot or drinking alcohol as soon as possible. I also don’t want to be a grandpa any time soon. I don’t want to raise grandkids when I’m in my 30’s or 40’s. Actually, I don’t want to ever have to raise grandkids. I want my kids to be old enough and responsible enough to raise their own kids.
I would love to hear your opinions on this. For those that think this is whack, please keep it civil and debate this in a calm manner. Above all else, I love my freedom of speech. 

-caleb